The Anxiety that wasn’t mine

How I learned to tell the difference between my emotions and those of others – and to recognize what truly belongs to me.

For a big part of my life, I navigated through an intense emotional space without knowing that some of the feelings I was experiencing weren’t even mine. I felt anxiety, confusion, irritation, anger – just to name a few – and didn’t realize I had identified with them, even though they didn’t originate within me.

I wish I had heard a different perspective years ago, one that could explain what I was feeling.

It all comes down to a single question:

Which of the emotions you’re feeling actually belong to you?

I ended up working in communication – marketing field, constantly surrounded by people and always tuned into their emotional states. Without knowing it, I was picking up emotions, thoughts, tension, and restlessness from the field – and mistaking them for my own.

After years of self-observation, awareness practices, and learning through personal experience – the hard way, if I’m honest – I finally began to notice a subtle but powerful difference:
between what I truly feel and what is truly mine, and what I absorb from others.

That shift changed everything for me. Not because “I reclaimed my power” – I tend to avoid that expression, as I don’t believe we ever truly lose our power. It's always there within us. We just disconnect from it (just as we sometimes disconnect from ourselves).


So there’s nothing to “reclaim” – only to reconnect with what’s already present.
What changed is that I learned to stand in my own truth.


To stop identifying with what isn’t truly mine – starting with other people’s emotions and inner states.


What happens when you absorb others’ emotions

When you absorb emotions from the field, you also tap into the energy of stress, among others, which shows up as anxiety, tension, irritability, or even anger.

And your mind, trying to make sense of it all, interprets those sensations as your own, struggling to find the cause.


That’s how identification happens.

For years, I believed I had an anxious temperament. Even in therapy, my scores reflected that.
I lived with a persistent undercurrent of unease that never seemed to go away.


And over time, I discovered it wasn’t even mine.

On some days, I would feel emotionally overwhelmed by the end of the workday for example – waves of nausea, dizziness, emotional fog, or migraines that kept me in bed. I felt completely drained.
That was my “normal.”

Other times, I’d feel irritated or frustrated all day, without any clear reason. It was like one of those “woke up on the wrong side of the bed” days – except I had woken up feeling totally fine. Something had happened along the way.


When I got home to my safe space however, part of the feelings would diminished their intensity considerably. Or would simply vanish, as if they were never there.
But they were – they just didn’t belong to me.


How to tell the difference between your emotions and those you’ve absorbed

• Notice sudden emotional shifts. Were you feeling fine, then suddenly anxious, restless, or irritable – without a clear reason?

• Ask a simple question: “Is this emotion mine?” The answer often comes subtly – a gentle inner “no,” a wave of clarity, or a release in your body. Your body always speaks to you and tells you the truth. Your truth.

• Step away from the environment. If your state eases or disappears when doing go, it likely wasn’t yours.


Some personal examples

• When I come home and feel suddenly irritated the moment I walk through the door, I know my partner had a tough day. I absorbed that energy from him.

• When I’m in a meeting that becomes tense, I might start feeling restless out of nowhere – even though five minutes ago I was completely calm.

• When I’m in a crowded space, like public transport, I can sense the rising anger in the room before anyone even expresses it.


How I quickly re-center myself emotionally and energetically

• I take a symbolic step back – even just an inch. It helps me energetically retreat from the chaos or dense energy around me.

• I inhale and exhale deeply. My breath is my anchor.

• I repeat inwardly: “This emotion is not mine. I am Light and calm.”

• I visualize Light cleansing my energy field and filling me with peace. I imagine the room or space being washed in Light. (Even if I can't visualize clearly at that specific moment, I trust my intention is enough.)

• I give myself permission not to react immediately. I allow the emotion to move through me without feeding it. I stay with what’s happening in my body.

• Before leaving the house, I do a quick energetic protection, especially if I have a long day ahead. You’ll find a guided version in the Resources section , showing you how to do an energy shield ritual step by step.


About empaths – and your superpower

If you resonate with what I’ve described so far, chances are you’re an empath.
That’s not a weakness.
It’s your gift.

It can feel overwhelming at first – especially when you don’t yet know how to work with this gift in a way that supports you and others. But over time, it becomes a superpower.
It allows you to deeply connect with the world around you.

The key is to learn to feel the difference.


To recognize what is truly yours – and what isn’t.


To stay anchored in yourself.

For me, this gift has led to a beautiful path.
Today, it supports the work I do as a facilitator in alternative therapy sessions – because I can feel the emotional nuances of those I work with, often before they become visible or are consciously acknowledged.
And I no longer confuse them with my own.



How to activate your gift, with intention, through a short exercise

Next time you’re at a concert, close your eyes.
Feel the energy of the crowd.

The joy. The excitement. The artist’s euphoria. The collective vibe.


Let yourself breathe into that state. Immerse yourself in it.


Let the joy and enthusiasm of so many people fill your heart and soul.


Let yourself breathe in sync with the crowd – breathing in collective joy.


Be one with the moment. One with the people.

This is the empath gift. 💛

When you learn to distinguish what’s yours from what’s not, you start living with so much more ease.



Categorii: #EmotionalRegulation #Wellbeing #HarmonRise

With gratitude for you being here,

A.